Taking Action - How to Live a Life You Love
Once your vision and plan are defined, it's time to move into action. We don't have any choice whether we take action because for conscious human beings it is in fact necessary to do things. But in the majority of cases, we do have a choice about which actions we take, and when. Structure for Support works inside the model that what will bring the greatest joy, happiness and fulfillment is to have what you do be an expression of the vision you have for your life.
This takes planning: determining what you are going to do, how often and when. Surprisingly, many people resist this step. They don't view it as very important, or it's too complicated and involved, or they are worried that it will make their daily lives too constricting. Often, behind these concerns is doubt about whether it is even possible to adequately plan what they are going to do, or doubt whether they will be able to do all those tasks. They fear disappointment and a blow to their self-esteem, but as we discussed in the section on Creating Your Vision, not doing what you really want is far more damaging. When these types of concerns arise, it is a sign that you have let the past slip into your future and are not being present to the vision you created.
Let me pause, then, for a moment to talk about the Structure for Support process. It starts with you determining your vision for your life. With your vision as your guide, you look at all the different areas of your life and come up with a balanced plan and goals for what you want your life to be about. When it comes to choosing which actions and tasks you will assign yourself, it will again be YOU making the decisions. You will design your life the way you want. There should not be a single action in your plan which you do not want to take (all things considered). The plan can be very loosely defined; what's important is that you are taking the time to look at and consider the different areas of your life. If it's your plan, your way, why would you resist it?
Taking Action
When the action plan or task list has been completed and you know what you want to be doing each day, or at least some key actions you have chosen in support of your goals and vision, it is time for the culminating step: to actually do what you have planned.
This step is vitally important because being in action is how we actually live a life we love. Consider that if you are not actively pursuing what you really want, you'll know it (whether you are inclined to acknowledge it to yourself or not). How can you be truly happy if you know (consciously or unconsciously) that you are not pursuing what matters most to you? On the other hand, if you are pursuing what you really want, and doing it with commitment and integrity, you'll know that too. And therein lies the well-spring for your happiness and joy, for loving yourself and your life.
The key lies in integrity: 1) keeping your vision present and 2) actually completing the tasks you've set out for yourself -- or acknowledging that you have not or will not be completing those tasks to the people to whom they matter (including yourself) and indicating whether you intend to recommit to the task, or if you are altering the task or choosing to forego the task altogether.
As in most endeavors, it takes practice to master the art of living a life you love - trying, failing or succeeding, adjusting and then trying again. From a certain perspective, the results don't really matter, but the pursuit of them is essential. There is a Buddhist saying that sums it up nicely: live your life as if it mattered, even though you know it doesn't.
Creating a list of actions and commitedly trying to achieve the tasks on the list can reveal three important aspects of your plan:
- You might discover that you really don't want to do a task you assigned yourself. My coaching generally is to do what you said anyway. This maintains your integrity, which is vital to the process. Afterward, review why you were so resistant to the task. You might choose a different task going forward that is more appealing and still accomplishes your goal. Or you might realize that the goal this task is designed to move you toward isn't quite what you want, and you can choose to alter the goal.
- You might and probably will discover that you are struggling to complete all the tasks on your list. The list allows you to see that your expectations were too great and that you need to scale back. Or you might become more determined and more focused by working on organizing your time more effectively, or avoiding tasks, or taking less "time off". Your struggles to complete the tasks you've assigned yourself might also suggest strategies for accomplishing tasks more quickly or for devising tasks that support more than one goal. Bottom line is that the list can help you to become much more real about what you are actually accomplishing, what you are really committed to and what you can and cannot do in the time available. This all falls into the category of practice, and your proficiency will naturally improve week to week.
- Finally, by commitedly pursuing the tasks you assign yourself, you will learn that you can count on yourself to do what you say you will do, and to actually accomplish the goals you create for yourself. This success can have profound effects on your psychology, where you move from low confidence and low self-esteem to high confidence and high self-esteem. This is nice for you, of course, but it also has the potential of rocking your world because you begin to dare to pursue what you REALLY want which you never believed would be possible for you.
